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I will never forget the night I walked into the bathroom and found my teenage daughter dry heaving over the toilet and telling me that if the violent images repeating on a loop in her head were true, then she didn’t deserve to live. I grieved to know that she’d inherited the beast known as Harm OCD.

When I first experienced this form of OCD at the age of thirteen, I had no idea what it was. I thought perhaps I was a murderer and just hadn’t acted on my intrusive thoughts yet. Harm OCD does not mean you are a terrible person or violent. In fact, studies have shown those with Harm OCD are actually less likely to commit violent acts–the sufferers’ sense of empathy and compassion can actually drive the compulsions.

I am not a medical professional, I am a mom and someone who has experienced this disorder. This blog is not meant to treat or diagnose but to simply share resources, insights, and encouragement.

“You’re Not a Murderer: You Just Have OCD is a prime example of the kind of candid, thoughtful memoir needed to convince people they are not alone in their mental health struggles and that capable help is available, and often essential.”—Doug Smith, M.D., DLFAPA Director of Community Psychiatry at Northeast Ohio Medical University

“You’re Not A Murderer: You Just Have Harm OCD rocked me. I’ve been a medical doctor for 38 years and have never read a more brave, authentic and honest description of mental illness and its effects on the individual and the family. If you are a human who desires to help others, this book is for you.” —Martha B. Boone, M.D. author of The Unfettered Urologist 

“…written with deep reflection and honesty, as well as infinite love.” —Beverly J. Armento, author, Seeing Eye Girl: A Memoir of Madness, Resilience, and Hope